I'm not despairing, I feel like it'll all be taken care of, I know I won't be unhappy forever, I know I'll find some answers eventually. And I'm still sad though I'm pretty much okay with that too.
Kinda just floating on the water, not sinking under, still creating ripples, even though I don't think they make any sort of a difference and I guess I kinda care about that but not really. Not really moving, no current, no wind, and I'm not swimming. Don't wanna swim, just wanna curl up in my heart and go to sleep for a while, thoughtless, dreamless, but time-traceable. Is that even possible? I don't really think so... Don't even have the will to just sink under. Or something's holding me up. I guess, like I said before, something's just kinda protecting me. I could fall, but I don't, and I imagine I just won't. Doesn't really even appeal to me.
Why do I even write this stuff? None of it seems to matter.
I thought of something today, though. I'm not sad all the time, I just write more when I'm sad because I feel the need to explain to myself why I'm sad, not even so much to other people as just to myself. 'Cause half the time I feel and I have no idea why.
No comments:
Post a Comment