Wind passed through, husk of
cicada on stalk of
dry grass. 

An Insult or a Fact?: Hypocritical

To call a person hypocrite doesn't seem like much of an insult to me.

To be human is to be hypocritical, contradictory by definition. We are constantly growing and changing, and our emotions and outlooks evolve by the moment. When we are angry we think differently from when we're happy. Things that sound great when we're well-rested and well fed sound terrible when we're sleep-deprived and hungry. We say things we mean whole-heartedly when we're depressed and frustrated, but we take them back aghast and ashamed when we've emerged from the tunnel of bad feelings. We are completely vulnerable to so many things that direct, manipulate and persuade us in myriad ways.
Being so changeable isn't necessarily bad, nor does it mean that what we changed from was less desirable than what we are now. We -as humans, as creatures of the world, as denizens of nature- just change; constantly.
I am a hypocrite, dear, and in some ways I am not happy about it, but I also don't think it is a terrible as some would have us think. It's part of life; it's part of learning. We think we want or like something, but when we have it we change our minds because it wasn't what we expected, or we find that it doesn't suit us as well as we thought. We think we'll hate something, but when we try it, we find it isn't as bad as we once thought. My mom encouraged me to take a book binding class at our local college one winter. I was terrified. I convinced her to stay with me for a few minutes during the first class, but it turned out to be not as bad as I'd expected; not as big or scary or intimidating as I'd imagined. I learned a lot in that month-long class; a lot I continue to do, skills that have proved to be very useful to how I live my life. I've created a couple of journals I've since filled up, and many gifts for my friends and family.
The point is, if you're actively learning and growing in your life, you are probably going to do, say, and be some hypocritical things. You may be perfectly sincere and still become "hypocritical" by changing your mind or choosing something new and different for perfectly logical and sound reasons. Even if you are at a standstill as a human being, you're going to be hypocritical. It's okay. Be conscious and aware, and don't let it define you. We're playing this whole life thing by ear, despite what anyone might tell you.

Wind passed through me, I 

could not catch it. Cicada 

husk on stalk of grass. 

Moon, earth, and a new sun

You're still shiny
Even though you're invisible.
Chasing our own stars
On separate sides of the Earth. 

Holding Hands with God

My eyes are thirsty 

And my soul is desiccated

Because I have forgotten the feel of your fingers, 

God,

On my palms. 

I never did learn to fully trust you 

And you have flown from the cage in my heart.

But when I remember to look up, 

You greet me from the fence posts,

The song of red winged black bird

And mourning dove, 

And you whisper in the back of my hollow throat. 

I abandon the pretense of walking on the road

Cut across the vacant lot of town
Defy the fences built by own nervous mind

And hold my hands, 

Palms out,

To the phantom of you. 

Halfway mark

 Five hundred cranes folded and strung

        

Something was lost 

in the peppered night air.
Trees bloomed sweetly secret.