April 28th, 2011. Thursday

A letter

Dear Om,
The friendship we had was special, we
were able to talk as never before with
each other. We were true friends and
soul sisters, but why couldn't you
acknowledge that when we ceased
to be friends?
I acknowledge it, I cherish the
friendship we had, the memories I hold.
But I don't necessarily want it all back,
want you back.
I'm sure you're a good person still, but
you seem to be lacking in... Something,
 I'm not even sure what anymore. It's
not even that you act and dress
outrageously to be different, you were
the same way when we first met, and I
was kinda terrified of you, I figured I'd
become best friends with your sister. And
I did, eventually. But I became insanely
best friends with you first, I was somehow
drawn to you and your rebellion, even
though I don't think you know what you're
rebelling against.
We really connected somehow. We were
able to tell each other things that had
been almost taboo with previous best friends.

I guess I'm the one who decided not to be
friends again after that second time, I'd been
 hurt too much, and I decided it was time
to move on.
I'm glad you were able to move on, Om.
I'm glad for you.

You've changed my life in ways I can
readily see, and in ways that I may not
even know about. Some people tell me
I've been able to change your life as well.
Perhaps I was your first real and not
online friend. I hope I gave you something,
because I readily admit that you gave me
something, if only just sweet memories.
Maybe someday I'll be able to bear to
talk to you, I hope you don't ever
feel slighted by me.

Sincerely,
And affectionately in the past,
Yours,
Amoniel